


Sunrise

by Missy_dee811



Series: Skylines [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers Tower, Bloodplay, Blow Jobs, Domestic Avengers, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Iron Man 3 Compliant, M/M, Natasha Feels, Natasha Is a Good Bro, Non-Linear Narrative, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Oral Sex, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Post-Canon, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Rhodey Is a Good Bro, Smut, Tony Feels, Tony Has Issues, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-01
Updated: 2016-10-26
Packaged: 2018-05-04 07:32:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5325887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy_dee811/pseuds/Missy_dee811
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve and Tony have kept their relationship a secret from the world at large, but not their friends. Steve, with Sam and Natasha's help, departs to find Bucky, leaving Tony to deal with his feelings. In the meantime, he learns about Natasha and Pepper. Rhodey and Tony deal with their feelings and hit the town; it doesn't end well. When Steve returns, word gets out that he and Tony are in a relationship, and the Avengers have to deal with the media fallout.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dawn

**Author's Note:**

  * For [roachalk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roachalk/gifts), [tarialdarion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tarialdarion/gifts).



> Can be read as a standalone.
> 
> Timeline: Tony and Pepper break up after the events of Age of Ultron, in the summer of 2015. The fic begins in the summer of 2016, the flashbacks date to sometime in between, and all future events take place in either 2016 or beyond.

The feel of silk beneath his cheeks roused him. He hadn't remembered falling asleep, let alone on his bed. He opened one eye and caught a glimpse of the blond sleeping next to him. He smiled; dawn was upon them, apparent in the sunlight peeking through the thick, dark drapes. He readjusted himself, now lying on his back. He had started to sit up when he felt warm, muscular hands caressing his spine, followed by a deep voice saying, "Up already?"

Tony cocked his head, admiring those bright blue eyes, and responded, "Funny, I don't remember sleeping."

The blond rose, cotton pajamas hugging his hips. Tony tried to focus on what Steve was saying but his thoughts kept drifting... "I wasn't going to let you sleep in the lab again, sprawled all over blueprints and reports." The amusement in Steve’s eyes betrayed his reproachful tone. Tony walked over and wrapped his arms around his waist, breathing in his scent, his head in the crook of Steve's neck.

"Good morning, beloved. Coffee?" The blond returned the hug, rolling his eyes, and kissed his lover on the forehead.

"Fine, coffee it is," said a disappointed Tony.

They walked toward the kitchen, more sunlight filtering in as the sun continued to rise. A cool voice spoke, "Well, well, shellhead's up before noon." The redhead walked over to the two men, handing them each a mug of coffee. "Cap, you up for a run...?" Her long, luscious auburn hair flirted with her waist as she moved. The sun, sneaking its way into the kitchen, accentuated her muscular arms and legs.

The brunet smiled approvingly. "Nat, if you wanted Steve all to yourself, all you had to do was ask." A faint smirk played on her lips in response. Steve turned to look at Tony, who answered the question he hadn't asked, "I have work to catch up on... You know the stuff I was doing last night."

Steve interjected, "You mean the files you were sleeping on?"

Tony responded, his lips teasing into a smirk, "Yeah, yeah... Catch up with you later." Waving, he made his way to the elevator. Mug still in the air, he tilted his head back and said, "Thanks for the coffee."

After a breakfast spent discussing work, Steve went back to the bedroom he and Tony have been sharing to get ready before meeting up with Natasha. He still felt uncomfortable calling it his bedroom but he could just imagine the look Tony would give him at the thought.

By now the sun had risen, promising a warm summer day. "Park or street?" She started jogging and motioned toward the park.

"You're going to have to tell him one of these days. If he finds out, he won't be pleased. He's not too keen on surprises." Sweat dripped down her face as her ponytail swung from side to side behind her. She checked her biometrics on a device on her wrist and then turned to her running partner.

He had stopped a few yards behind her and was leaning against a tree. She walked over to him.

"Cap..."

He held up a finger, "Nat, you're right. I should tell him." She gave him a solemn nod and continued jogging. He had no trouble catching up to her, "I'll do it when we get back. He'll be expecting me."

Meanwhile, in his workshop, Tony Stark was tinkering with his armor. He had spent most of his morning chest-deep in a mess of wires and cables when a woman’s voice filled the room.

"Boss, Captain Rogers, and Ms. Romanoff have returned from their morning jog."

The inventor pulled himself out of the suit, wiping the sweat off his brow. "Thank you, FRIDAY." He turned to face his computer monitor and moments later, he heard footsteps.

Steve keyed in his code and walked in, sweat glistening on his skin. "I figured you'd still be here." Tony turned to face him, wiping some of the grease on his jeans, when he noticed something was off.

"What's with the look?" There was a pained expression on the blond's face.

"Look, I've been meaning to tell you...” Tony raised his brow and Steve, in turn, sighed. “I think I found Bucky."

The inventor looked at his lover and his expression softened. "Yeah, well I knew it was only a matter of time. You, Nat, and Sam have been relentlessly looking for him for months." Steve's face changed from relief to confusion at that response.

Tony just shrugged. "Yes, I knew."

"Wait, you knew I had been looking for him?" Steve eyed him quizzically and then started pacing around the room.

"Look, I know you. I knew you wouldn't stop until you knew for sure and the only way to do so would be to find him. I read all the S.H.I.E.L.D. files. You do know they're on the internet. Literally anyone with Wi-Fi can read them, not that they would – I mean, why would you want to read that when there are so many better things TO read – but I digress."

He had gotten off his chair and had started walking around; putting away all the tools and supplies, which he had been using the night before, as he continued speaking. "I didn't think it prudent to interrupt your search. Nat and Sam know what they're doing... She’s a super spy. I read it in her file.” Steve turned to see a dorky smile plastered on his lover’s face and couldn’t help but smile in return. Having eased some of the tension, Tony continued. “Plus, I have my hands full." He motioned to his workspace, littered with blueprints, reports, and armor scraps.

In that moment, DUM-E decided to knock over the metal scraps he was picking up. Steve stifled a laugh and Tony glared at the robot. “I swear to God, one day I will get rid of you,” he said before turning back to Steve. “Hey, if Bucky needs a new arm, I’m your guy,” motioning to himself. Steve shook his head, snickering. 

Finally settling on the sofa, Steve ran his hands through his hair. Tony followed suit and sat down next to him. He looked into Tony’s warm brown eyes and sighed. "So, I take it you know what comes next."

Tony, looking up and into his piercing blue eyes, responded, "You’re going to fly halfway across the world to look for him. You don’t even know for sure if he’ll still be there when you get there but you won't leave without him."

Steve chuckled. "That obvious, huh?"

"I _am_ a genius,” Tony responded flashing that million-dollar smile he usually saved for the cameras. Steve shook his head in laughter. Tony continued to speak, breaking eye contact, “That doesn't mean I'm not worried, but God knows I do most things on a whim so I'm in no position to stop you, if that's what's bothering you."

Steve cupped his face before leaning in for a kiss. “Thank you.”

Just as Steve was about to break away, Tony wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him passionately, sliding over and pushing Steve onto his back, eliminating the space that had existed between them. Tony had been nibbling on Steve’s ear when suddenly, he got up and started pacing, running his fingers through his hair, lost in thought. Steve, still lying on his back, looked up at him, confusion, and worry playing across his handsome features. He was about to speak and question the sudden mood change when Tony finally turned to look at him and in all seriousness said, “The press cannot get a hold of this.”

*~*~*~*~*~

Steve and Tony had been dating for a few months. Pepper, the Avengers, and a handful of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents – namely, the ones they could trust – all knew. The rest of the world was none the wiser and Tony intended to keep it that way for as long as he could. Having grown up in the spotlight, he was glad that his personal life wasn’t tabloid fodder for the time being. He had enough on his mind as it was.

The affair had started innocently enough. Steve had made it clear that his home was with the Avengers, and that it was Tony that had given them – and most importantly, him – a place to stay, a place to call their own, away from prying eyes. Over time, the two grew close. Steve came to realize Tony’s aloof persona was just that: a mask. Once the layers started to peel away, he came to see him for the man he was, not the one he pretended to be, and found himself transfixed. He approached Sam, seeking advice; Sam just laughed and said, “Ask the man out.”

Steve vowed to do so when the opportunity arose. The moment presented itself one afternoon after an Avengers meeting. The others had all parted ways, leaving Steve and Tony alone. Apprehensively, he approached Tony, who had just started to collect the files they had been reading and was organizing them for storage, and said, “Hey… If you’re not doing anything… I’m free tonight.” Tony turned to look at him. Steve was standing rather guarded, as if preparing for a letdown. Tony couldn’t help but chuckle and replied, “Cap, I thought you’d never ask.”

Despite not being CEO, Tony spent a considerable amount of time at Stark Industries either working on R&D or sitting in on board meetings, much to his chagrin. Steve and Natasha, when they weren't in the Tower, spent their time leading and training the new Avengers and S.H.I.E.L.D. recruits at the upstate facility. Tony relished in the ability to get away from the city, and the facility offered the perfect excuse.

He’d come up, check in with everyone, and steal Steve for a few hours. At first, it was innocent. They’d discuss work over lunch. They’d hide in conference rooms where Tony could rant about the board without anyone overhearing. They’d go for long drives, arguing over song choices as they made their way down winding country roads. They’d chat on the roof, discussing anything and everything that came to mind. Both enjoying the other’s company and the opportunity to be away from their responsibilities, if only for a little while. Eventually, they had to drop the façade: they were falling in love.

_“Cap, I’m here to kidnap you.”_

_“It’s not really a kidnapping if I agree.”_

_“Dammit Cap, just let me do this.”_

_“Why?”_

_“It’s called ‘role-playing,’ it’s a thing people do… for fun…” Rubbing his temples, he stared up at Steve, “Please…”_

_Steve could hear the nervousness in Tony’s voice; deciding he was being cruel, he grabbed his jacket before making his way out the door. At the last moment, he stepped aside and motioned for Tony to lead. “You’re the one kidnapping me so it’s not like I know where we’re going.”_

_If Tony had been apprehensive, there was no trace of it on his face now. He grinned up at Steve and grabbed his wrist, leading him out the door. “Trust me, you’ll love it.”_

_Some hours had passed when Tony awoke to find he was alone. The early morning sun was still low in the sky, nestled just above the canopy. He grabbed his burgundy bathrobe from the armchair next to the bed, fondly recalling how Steve had unceremoniously tossed it there the night before, and stepped out onto the porch._

_The cabin they were in was deep in the woods, far away from prying eyes. It was cozy and warm. The air was fresher. Tony had acquired the property shortly after transforming the abandoned upstate facility into the new Avengers HQ. He needed a place he could stay and the surrounding small, rural towns weren’t up to the task._

_Subconsciously, he knew Steve would love the quaint atmosphere. Consciously, he had been plotting to bring him here from the moment he realized Steve shared his feelings._

_Tony smiled when he saw Steve, in a deep blue bathrobe and matching slippers, hunched over, sketching his view of the Adirondacks._

_“See, I told you it’d be worth it.”_

_Upon hearing his voice, Steve dropped his sketchpad and pencil on the seat and casually walked over to stand in front of Tony. Tony felt the air escape his lungs as he caught Steve’s eye. He was gazing intently at Tony, as if seeing him – really seeing him – for the first time. It conjured images of the night before in Tony’s mind and before he knew it, he was sliding the robe he was wearing off his shoulders, dragging his lover back into the cabin without even bothering to shut the door._

At first, Steve and Tony had tried to keep their relationship a secret but it was no use. Soldiers, ex-assassins, and super spies surrounded them. Natasha had already teased them about it before she knew. Tony was almost certain that she was trying to bait Steve into divulging the truth since she knew her tactics wouldn’t work on the super soldier. After relentless teasing, one day a few short weeks after the camping trip, Steve had caved in and during a meeting blurted out, “Yes, we’re dating!”

Even Barton had joined in on the fun. Calling not long after the incident, barking with laughter, and claiming to have known since the night they stayed on the farm. Apparently, he and Thor had placed bets.

*~*~*~*~*~

Following their break-up, Pepper was worried that Tony was going to wallow in sadness, or lock himself in the Tower and work himself to death, both of which were plausible given his personal history. Ultron and the disaster in Sokovia were still fresh in his mind, and knowing Tony, he didn’t need much of a reason to feel sorry for himself. Plagued by guilt, Pepper decided to go talk to Tony; they were still friends after all.

Having decided it would be best to approach him when he was home; she stopped by on a Friday evening after work. Making her way up to the penthouse, as she had done many times before, was a little disconcerting but she wouldn’t back out now. When she reached the front door, she keyed in her code, uncertain if it would work and pleasantly surprised when it did. As she walked in, a woman’s voice reminiscent of her own greeted her; it was unnerving, but she supposed it was Tony’s way of thanking her.

"Welcome back, Ms. Potts," said the cool voice, her tone indiscernible.

"Oh, thank you, FRIDAY.” She looked around the place; it was spotless and just as she remembered it.  _I guess the Avengers aren’t here this weekend._  Not wishing to overstep her bounds, she asked FRIDAY, “Where's Tony?"

She knew the answer even before she had asked. As she was making her way downstairs, she looked up just in time to see the sun setting behind New York. She was flooded with fond memories of all the evenings they had spent watching movies and laughing together.  _It’s for the_   _best_ ; she reminded herself when FRIDAY’s response pulled her from her reverie.

"As usual, he’s in his workshop."

She stood in front of the door to the workshop and asked FRIDAY nervously, "Did you tell him I was here?"

"No," responded the AI rather bashfully.

Pepper keyed in her code, hoping it would still work but not surprised when the door swung open. The music blasting in the background filled the hallway. It took a second for her eyes to adjust to the dim lighting. She smiled as she watched Tony, in the center of it all, tapping his foot along to the guitar solo, working on some rather complicated calculations. She wasn't sure he had even heard her come in until he turned around. "Hey, Pep. I almost forgot those codes still worked."

A faint smile lit her face. "Tony, how long… When was the last time you showered?" She looked around the room and before he had time to answer, she had walked over and dragged him out of the chair.

A few hours later, they were sitting in a luxurious restaurant waiting for their server to return with their drinks. Donning the business suit she had worn to work, she looked right at home among the executives. Tony, for his part, looked as handsome as ever in his all-black suit. He looked up for a moment, having decided on his order, when he found himself gazing at her freckles, taking in the smoothness of her skin, and the curve of her lips but not before she caught him lost in his thoughts. They shared a look of mutual understanding.

"Tony, don't look at me like that," she said somewhat timidly.

Tony closed his menu and laced his fingers together. Looking into her eyes, he sighed, "I'm never going to stop loving you, even if we're not together." He reached out for her hand, smiling as he said, "Don't worry, despite what I may have lead you to believe, I'm not falling apart. Or at least, not this time." She gave him a look but beckoned him to continue speaking, clearly not persuaded by his argument. The billionaire flashed a grin. "I know that's why we're sitting here."

She gave him an apologetic look. "So that's why you agreed to this then?"

He smiled one of those smiles he usually reserved for magazine covers. "No, I have something to tell you."

Out of curiosity, she said, "OK, Mr. Stark, spill the beans," and closed her menu just as the server approached the table and took their dinner requests.

As they ate their dinner, he told her about his relationship with Steve. How over the course of a few months, they had grown close, and how happy he was to be with him. He rambled about the Avengers and the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, but mostly, his comments centered on Steve. Pepper let him talk, happy to see him engaged in something that didn’t involve a wrench. At the end, Pepper was beaming, "Who would've thought: two of the world’s most popular and well-known superheroes…"

He cut her off, unintentionally. "Well, that's the thing I wanted to discuss with you: the press cannot find out. They would have a field day and Steve would never be able to go anywhere without the paparazzi hounding him. He doesn't need that. I've had to deal with this shit my whole life; Steve hasn't."

She looked at him and nodded. "Tell me about it. First, they'd learn we're not together anymore. They'd find some way to blame me, insist that I had only ever wanted your company for some petty reason..." She trailed off as Tony laughed mirthlessly.

"What about me? I'd be the rich, old playboy that corrupted the young, impressionable Captain America. I'd never hear the end of that shit. They'd drag my name into the mud, probably erase my sexuality, and insist that I had only dated you as a cover."

Pepper nodded in agreement just as the server returned with their dessert. They continued to laugh and chat lightheartedly until it was time to leave.

“This has been fun, Pep. We should do it again,” he said as he signed the receipt and put on his jacket while she gathered her things.

As they were walking down the front steps, he reached out to grab her arm to ensure she wouldn’t fall. As if on cue, the dizzying flash of cameras from all angles caught them off guard. The commotion only lasted for a handful of moments before their car pulled up, but those moments were more than enough to awaken Tony’s deep-seated inhibitions. He had been hoping against hope that his anxiety wouldn’t rear its ugly head but it was too late for that. _Stark, the last thing you need is an anxiety attack caught on camera… That already happened in California, we don’t need it to happen again._

_Just breathe._

_In and out._

_One, two..._  

Pepper, sensing his discomfort, quickly led him to the car, arm -in-arm, without saying a word.

It was only after they were safely inside the vehicle and it had started to move that he spoke. "Motherfuckers, they ambushed us."

Pepper lightly touched his leg. He was shaking. She didn’t need to look up to know he had closed his eyes in an effort to control his breathing. "Tony, it's OK. You’re OK. I’m here."

"Please tell me this whole thing isn’t going to come back and bite me in the ass." He leaned his head against the window. In it, she could see could see his reflection and the barrage of emotions that flashed across his eyes. She wasn’t entirely sure whether he was talking about his anxiety, the paparazzi, or Steve, but she imagined it was all of the above. Without a word, she placed her hand lightly over his and fought back the urge to kiss him.

*~*~*~*~*~

Although it had been months since their dinner and the ensuing anxiety attack, the media was still none the wiser and Tony preferred it that way. News that the billionaire playboy Tony Stark and his former secretary, now CEO of his father’s company, had split and that he was dating America’s poster boy for goodness, Captain America, would surely make headlines around the world, ending their rather tranquil love affair and catapulting it to front-page gossip. Tony could handle the fallout; he’d been caught on camera doing much worse.

The fact that he and Pepper continued to appear together served to complicate things further, even though it was mostly for business reasons, but the press didn’t see it that way. Although Steve never mentioned it, Tony was sure it irked him to know that he couldn’t be in Pepper’s place. He knew he would be none too pleased if he were the one sidelined.

He put those thoughts aside for the moment, returning to the conversation at hand.

“Ugh, just imagine the field day. For starters, I’d be the instigator that corrupted Captain America. Not to mention they’d say that Pepper coerced me into giving her the company, that she’s a gold digger…” Tony trailed off and started pacing again.

Steve sat up and crossed his arms over his chest. “But I’m not even going to be around.”

Tony, raising his voice slightly, retorted, “Are you kidding? That’s only going to make it even worse! _‘Trouble in paradise: the Man of Iron isn’t enough for America’s super soldier turned Avenger; he’s off to rekindle with an old flame. Will the man that stands for freedom and liberty be able to undo the chains imprisoning his long-lost lover?’_ Oh God, it sounds like one of those Nicholas Sparks novels but gayer.” Having understood the reference, Steve laughed.

“Fine, you have a point. So what would you like me to do?” Steve asked, uncertain of his next move.

Tony replied, “Well, you already said you’re going to find Bucky so I’m assuming you’re going to put together a stealth team. I can’t go with you. I’m neither a spy nor a soldier and I’m needed here.” He sighed and rubbed his temples, “Ugh, you’re rubbing off on me, and not in the fun way. Look at me being sensible. Pepper would be so proud. FRIDAY, for the record, let it be known that I can be reasonable.”

FRIDAY didn’t say anything, but Tony was sure, were she a person; she’d be shaking her head.

“I’ll remember this conversation when we’re in the field and you disobey my orders,” said Steve, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Ok, erase that, FRIDAY. I have a reputation to uphold.”

“And what reputation is that?” asked Steve.

“I’m incorrigible.”

Steve laughed, “Right. Back to the matter at hand. Sam and Nat are coming with me. No uniforms. No S.H.I.E.L.D.. This is strictly undercover.” Tony nodded, agreeing that this was the best course of action.

“When would you be leaving?” asked Tony.

Steve, unable to look him in the eye, said, “Tomorrow morning.”

Having mustered the courage to look him in the eye, he looked up and what he saw left Steve confused. Instead of a sad or disappointed Tony, Steve was face-to-face with a rather enthusiastic man who looked like he was about to bounce.

“Perfect!”

Steve raised a brow, still confused.

“FRIDAY?”

“Yes, boss,” responded the AI in her cool voice.

Tony looked at his watch. “Are we alone?”

FRIDAY responded with a hint of a sneer in her voice. “Other than Captain Rogers, you are indeed alone in the penthouse.”

A mischievous smile, one Steve knew rather well, played on Tony’s lips. “Good.” He turned to glance at Steve, who was eyeing him apprehensively. “Looks like it’s just us.” Tony’s smile was infectious, so much so that Steve couldn’t help but grin. He rose and walked over, putting his arms around Tony’s neck. Oddly enough, the gesture seemed to have calmed the rather bubbly man.

“So, what would you like to do, Mr. Stark?” Steve teased.

Instantly, Tony responded, “Ideally? You.” His voice low and hushed as he leaned into Steve’s ear. “Why, do you have other plans?”

Tony could feel the heat rising in Steve’s cheek as he gently lifted his chin and their lips met. The kiss was chaste but warm, inviting. They broke apart but not before Steve lowered his arms to wrap them around his waist and pull him closer.

Steve’s voice was rough when he spoke. “I missed you.”

“Darling, I always miss you,” Tony chuckled, closing the space between them and softly nibbling on Steve’s lower lip.

Just as Steve began to lift Tony’s tank top, Tony spoke. “Hey soldier, take it easy. Aren’t you going to wine and dine me first?”

Steve raised a brow, which both amused and surprised Tony, for Steve was usually the one to take things slow. Steve, on the other hand, just rolled his eyes. “Fine. Where shall we eat?”

“Ah, that’s a fantastic question! FRIDAY, any ideas?”

“Just one moment, boss. I’ve compiled a list of restaurants from which you and Captain Rogers can choose.” Tony beamed at his AI, who spoke more affectionately this time. “There’s a Thai place-”

“Perfect!” said Tony, cutting her off. “Book a reservation for eight thirty, will you?”

“As you wish, boss.”

“Tony, that’s hours from now. What could we possibly do that would take that long?”

Turning to Steve, and clearly ignoring his question, Tony winked at him. “Hey, super solider, how about a bath?”

Steve raised both brows this time. “You stopped me from taking off your shirt, but you want to bathe together?”

“Oh, Steve. Don’t be such a killjoy, you can look, but you can’t touch.” Steve was still giving him a look, so Tony continued. “Where are your table manners? Dinner first.”

“Tony, that’s hours from now.”

Tony lifted his arms, tugging his tank top off and dropping it to the floor as he walked out of the workshop. Turning back, he said, ignoring Steve’s complaint, “Well, are you coming or not?”

Steve, resigning himself to the whims of his eccentric lover, replied, “That depends, are there going to be hors d’oeuvres?”

Tony gasped and shot him a look of sheer shock. “The mouth on this one, I would never…”

“But, you like my mouth…”

Tony stopped and turned around but didn’t say anything. It was evident in the way his eyes peered into Steve that he was aroused. Without saying a word, he continued to strip on his way to the bathroom.

While Tony had no problem leaving the trail of discarded clothes on the floor for all to see, Steve didn’t think the other Avengers would appreciate it. They may be accepting - even encouraging - of their relationship, but surely that didn’t mean they wanted to know the excruciating details of their sordid love affair.

Steve finally entered the bathroom, tossing the garments he had picked up along the way into the hamper. It had taken Steve some time to get used to the opulence he saw before him. The bathroom, and the rest of the Tower, was beautiful, efficient, and extravagant just like its designer.

In the minutes Tony had had to prepare, he had managed to light some candles. Steve could smell the sandalwood but was unsure of the other notes.

There was heat rising from the bath, as the sound of the jets filled the room. Tony reappeared, after fetching extra towels, which he placed on the edge of the tub, opposite the candles.

He was wearing nothing but a loosely tied burgundy bathrobe.

Steve couldn’t help but smile as he thought of that night in the woods. Tony pulled him out of his reverie when he handed him a neatly folded deep blue one, which Steve placed on the edge of the tub closest to him. In that split second, Tony closed the space between them and whispered into Steve’s ear, his voice husky and warm, “I think one of us is overdressed.”

Tony’s fingers grazed Steve’s chest as he pulled the shirt over his head and bit down on his neck, hard enough to draw blood. A groan escaped Steve’s lips and in that moment, Tony felt fingers run through his hair, yanking his head back.

“What about the whole ‘look but don’t touch’ thing?”

“That rule only applies to you, sweetheart. I'm going to devour you. I thought I’d made myself clear,” said Tony before licking the blood from the bite mark. He could feel Steve shuddering.

Tony ran his fingers through Steve’s hair, massaging his scalp. “Do you like that?”

“Yes,” said Steve in a guttural voice that made Tony smile.

Tony continued to run his hands down Steve’s chest, as he kissed, licked, and nipped, before settling on his knees and removing what was left of Steve’s clothing. He flashed a smile just before he grabbed Steve’s hips, steadying him, and started licking the head in small, circular motions. Steve was ran his hands through Tony’s hair encouragingly. Tony teased him a little more, licking from the head to the shaft and playing with the slit.

A moan escaped Steve’s lips as Tony, without warning, took the entire length of him, not stopping until it reached the back of his throat. Steve grabbed his hair, but instead of pulling him back, as he did before, he held him in place. Tony took the hint and continued to work, breathing slowly through his nose. He cupped Steve’s balls, massaging them, as his tongue continued to work, relishing in the way that made Steve lose control. Just as he could feel Steve’s body about to give way, he stopped, pulling back.

“Oh God, no, why – don’t stop!”

Tony licked the shaft and said, “Oh, no one’s stopping… Just a pause.”

Steve looked down at him. His dilated pupils made his eyes look black, disguising the warmth that was there not long ago. There was something primal about them now. He wondered if Tony’s eyes mirrored his own. There was no mistaking his intensity now; Steve knew better than to disobey him when he commanded, “Get in the tub.”

“Now?”

“Yes, ‘now’.”

The bubbles had slowly faded but there were a few still lingering when Steve stepped into the tub. In that moment, he felt every muscle relax. The tension he didn’t know he was holding was fading and falling away quickly. “Tony, are you going to get in?” said Steve, raising his eyebrow.

“You know, patience is a virtue and you’re supposed to be the virtuous one here,” said Tony as he peeled off the maroon robe he had been wearing. Steve, who had been distracted by the way Tony’s mouth felt and the intensity of his gaze, hadn’t even noticed he was still dressed.

Steve gave Tony a knowing look; he had to admit they had gone most of the day without Tony making a disparaging comment toward himself. Even small victories are a cause for celebration.

“Tony, either you’re going to fuck me or I’m going to fuck you, but you cannot keep me waiting anymore.”

Tony stepped into the tub and slid in next to Steve, who opened his arms to cradle him close to his chest, before responding lightheartedly, “Why do you have to ruin it?”

Steve said, in mock shock, “How, exactly, is sex ‘ruining it?’”

“Well, you haven’t even commented on the water.”

Tony moved a bit so that Steve could stretch his body, allowing himself to feel the water ripple across his skin. Without looking, Steve knew Tony was watching him intently. If the water hadn’t been warm, surely the force of Tony’s gaze would have heated it. “The water feels fantastic. It’s like I’m floating.”

“Good, I set the water to match our body temperature. It’s all part of the illusion,” he said as he bent down to kiss Steve. Slowly at first, and then picking up the pace. Tony moved, straddling Steve as he started to sit up, Steve’s hands digging into his hips, seemingly carried away by the heat with which Tony kissed him. They pulled apart and Tony smiled. It was both dangerously intoxicating and strangely alluring.

“Stop doing that,” said Steve.

“Doing what,” said Tony, acting all coy.

“That kiss – the way you – it’s too much.”

“Honey, I haven’t even gotten started yet. Weren’t you the one begging? C’mon, let’s dry off,” said Tony, getting out of the tub and leaning over to assist Steve. Tony handed Steve his robe. It complimented his eyes so well. He strode over to the bed and called out to FRIDAY. “Cancel our reservations.”

“Sure thing, boss,” said FRIDAY, in a slightly judgmental tone. “Choosing to stay in? Would you like the privacy settings to be put in place?”

“Yes, please.”

“As you wish, boss.”

“Thank you, FRIDAY. Always so wonderful.”

Steve stood at the doorway, listening intently to the conversation. He enjoyed watching Tony interact with the many robots he had lying around his workshop. He knew it had been hard for Tony to adjust after losing JARVIS, but FRIDAY seemed to fill the void left by both JARVIS and Pepper. “I’d be jealous if it weren’t for the fact that I know you programmed her to be like that.”

Tony chuckled in amusement. “To be like what?”

Now, it was Steve’s turn to laugh. “And here I was, thinking I was the oblivious one. She acts like Pepper.”

At the sound of her name, Tony tensed.  _That's unusual_ , thought Steve.

Tony’s breathing quickened. He thought to himself, _Stark you’re ruining it. Why can’t you keep your mouth shut? Does Steve really need to know that you still love your ex-girlfriend, so much so that you made an AI modeled after her…? No, he most certainly doesn’t need to know that, but obviously, he figured it out. It’s not as if it was hard to deduce or anything. Hell, Pepper herself figured it out the last time she was here… I should tell Steve. Be honest, Stark. He was honest with you about Bucky. He’ll understand… Maybe? Hopefully?_

“Steve… Pepper and I aren’t together – we haven’t been together for quite some time but… I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving her and I’ve told her as much,” finished Tony, quickly.Steve could see the gears turning in Tony’s brain indubitably thinking up worst-case scenarios at lightning speed. He walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, still in his bathrobe, patiently waiting for Tony to respond. Tony, taking Steve’s queue, sat down next to him and nestled his head in the crook of his neck. “I’m going to fuck this up. I hope you know that.”

Steve moved to cup his cheeks; he was sure the pain he saw reflected in those deep brown eyes hadn’t been there moments ago. “Tony, I’ve always known you love her. I think it’s clear to anyone who’s known you for longer than ten minutes. And when I say ‘you’, I mean the _real_ you, not the one you wear like a glove the second you leave this place.”

Tony stood up and started pacing the room. He didn’t want to be having this conversation the night before Steve was supposed to leave for Europe for an indefinite amount of time, but – as is often the case with these matters – planning never helps. “You remember that night we went camping?”

Steve nodded; blushing slightly at the reminder of what had been their first real admission. The time they confessed their love and consummated their relationship. Tony knew Steve would never forget that evening.

“Yeah, well about a week… Was it a month? I don’t know. Whatever, that’s not what matters. After that, Pepper came by to check up on me. I hadn’t seen her since the breakup, other than at work, but I had been doing mostly Avengers stuff and since I spent most of my free time away from the city, she had taken that as a sign that I was planning or doing something reckless. Can’t say I blame her. Well, I’d been in the workshop for a few days, so she dragged me to dinner. That’s when I told her about – well, first I told her I still loved her –” said Tony, as he continued pacing around the bedroom, not being able to meet Steve’s eyes.

Steve’s heart was racing but he listened intently to every word Tony spoke, so he let Tony continue without interruption.

“But then, I told her about us, which made her very happy,” he paused and looked at Steve. Tony couldn’t identify the flurry of emotions that ran through his face before he started talking again. “We talked about the press and how they’d spin this whole story. As we were leaving the restaurant, the paparazzi ambushed us. I still don’t know how they knew we were there – it was a last minute thing. Pepper realized I was having an anxiety attack,” upon hearing those words, Steve tensed up but didn’t say anything, just continued to listen. “So we left as quickly as we could. Happy drove. It was a quiet ride.”

For a few minutes, Tony quietly paced around the room as Steve, still sitting on the edge of the bed in his bathrobe, waited to hear the rest. Some long, quiet moments later, Tony spoke again. “After a board meeting a few days later, Pepper approached me just as everyone was leaving. She confessed that she had wanted to kiss me on the drive back that night. She said seeing me like that concerned her. She also said she knew nothing good would come of any of this because,” he turned to look at Steve when he said it, “we’ve already tried this... and it didn’t work the first time.”

Tony was still pacing around the room. “Steve, I’m going to fuck this up. I have a tendency of destroying the things I love.”

Steve scoffed at that last remark. Steve still didn’t understand why Tony was telling him all of this and almost as if he had read his mind, Tony said, “I know you’re wondering why I’m telling you this. Steve, the press still thinks I’m seeing Pepper – to them, nothing’s changed. We haven’t been seen together publicly. Only the people we know and work with know about our relationship. Honestly, it’s refreshing – not having my personal life on display all the time – but I know this will have to end at some point. They’re going to find out some way or another and I’d rather have a say in it.”

To Steve’s surprise, Tony stopped pacing and joined him on the side of the bed again. “Steve, do you love Bucky?”

Confusion flashed across Steve’s face as he turned to face Tony, unsure of how best to respond. Steve replayed the conversation in his head and couldn’t quite follow Tony’s train of thought. After careful consideration, Steve responded, “I’m not really sure.”

It was Tony’s turn to look uncertain. Nonetheless, he let Steve continue. “I mean, do I love Bucky in the same way you love Pepper? I did, but that was before – before all of this. If you’re wondering if I’ll...” He paused, his brain finally catching up with the conversation. “Tony, I don’t even know if Bucky remembers me! I’m not going to fly halfway around the world to _‘rekindle with an old flame!’_ I’m going halfway around the world to save what’s left of the man I once knew – Rhodey did the same for you!” said Steve, exasperated. “You and Pepper were a couple but now you’re friends. You’ll probably always be friends. It has never bothered me. I don’t –”

At that point, Tony interjected, “Steve… The thing is – Pepper isn’t the only one who felt that way in the car.” He laced his fingers together on his lap as he said it.

Steve paused, needing a moment to process what Tony had just said. Tony, never one to miss an opportunity, hesitantly continued, “I – I missed her. Look, nothing happened that night. Nothing’s going to happen but – we were ambushed and – I don’t know… It felt nice to be needed.”

Steve was giving Tony a hard, quizzical look. He then sighed and said, “Tony… What do you want me to say? Do you want me to storm out of here and leave you sulking around, replaying every conversation we’ve ever had while you try to concoct some way to make this all your fault and hate yourself more than you already do? Have you been waiting – hoarding this information – until you knew for sure I was leaving? Were you planning for this all along?” Steve was finding it increasingly difficult to keep the bitterness out of his voice and Tony noticed.

Steve smoothed his palms on his lap, the softness of the velvet comforting him. “Tony… Listen, I’m not mad about what happened. I’m mad that you waited months to tell me this on the night before I leave on a trip, and not just any trip, but a trip that could very well change my – _our_ – lives. I don’t know when I’ll be back and for whatever reason, you decided that this was the best way to spend our last night together? I can’t decide if you’re being a masochist or a sadist but this needs to stop. I’m not going to leave you. I’m not leaving you for Bucky or anyone else. You’re going to have to try a lot harder to get me to break up with you.”

Getting on his knees in front of Tony, Steve grabbed his hands and looked into his eyes as he said, “Tony, I love you. Stop trying to find problems where there aren’t any. Stop trying to fix things before they’re broken. Just – try to live in the present. I know you’re a futurist, so I’m asking for the impossible, but for your own sake… Please?”

Tony bent down. His hands grazing Steve’s arms. He brought his left hand up to Steve’s face, caressing his cheek, and suddenly swooped in for a kiss. Steve rose, placing his hands on either side of Tony, who was still sitting on the edge of the bed, and then, slowly, started removing Tony’s robe, as the other man returned the favor. Soon, they were lying on top of each other, their robes discarded in a heap on the floor.

Steve pulled away shortly after. “Oh my – Tony, wait.” Instantly, Tony stopped. Trepidation plainly written on his face. “Tony, I – I need to know that you’ll be okay without me… While I’m gone.” Tony, who had been lying on his back, propped himself up on his elbows, their eyes locking.

“Steve, I – I’ll be okay.”

Steve pushed Tony back onto the bed, slowly tracing the scar on his chest where the arc reactor would have been. Tony closed his eyes slowly, but his breaths were sharp and quick. This time, Steve kissed him without warning.

He stared at the mouth, slowly moving down. He nibbled on his ear and slowly licked his collarbone while he played with his nipples. By the time he reached his navel, Tony was gripping his hair, all pretense gone. “Please…”

Steve vacillated, unsure whether to keep teasing or just cave in and give his lover what he wanted. After a few moments, he settled on the latterand started sucking on the head, slowly tracing small circles with his tongue. As his hands moved to his hips to keep him in place, Steve continued sucking on the head but wouldn’t give Tony the satisfaction of going down any further. Tony let his fingers roam, as if he were using his hands to sculpt, outlining the hard muscles of Steve’s back and arms. Steve reciprocated, and in one swift movement that was all lips and tongue, Tony felt the back of Steve’s throat and couldn’t help the low moans that escaped in the process.

*~*~*~*~*~

It was now well past midnight.

Tony lay, covered in sweat, his left arm draped around Steve’s waist, and the other in his hair. He was nestled between Steve’s left shoulder and arm. Steve, wearing a thin layer of perspiration, was sprawled across the bed diagonally, with both the pillows and the edges out of reach, his left hand on the small of Tony’s back. The two men had fallen asleep like that after only a few minutes.

Soon, the pre-dawn light started to filter in. Steve awoke first. He was torn. He knew he had to start packing for his impending flight, lest he run the risk of Natasha or Sam finding them like that, but all he wanted to do was lie in bed with the man he loved forever. He started peppering Tony with kisses along his shoulders and playing with his hair until warm brown eyes met bright blue ones.

“Good morning, beloved. Coffee?” said Steve.

“Oh God, yes.”

Steve laughed in response, pulling Tony in for a good morning kiss. “How did you sleep?” asked Steve. Tony turned to lie on his back completely, stretching.

“Fantastically, but now I’m awake and you’re leaving today and I don’t want you to go but I don’t want you not to go and I’m blabbering so please just shut me up with either your lips, your dick, or coffee. Really, I’m not fussy. Any one will do.” Steve, barking with laughter, propping himself on his right elbow, and turned to look at Tony. Whatever he saw pleased him, so he leaned in for another kiss. His lips were intoxicating.

“For as much as I would like to do this all day – and I would – I have a plane to catch,” said Steve into the crook of Tony’s neck after about an hour of long, lingering kisses and aimless hands gliding across skin like waves on a rocky shoreline.

“Killjoy.”

“I did offer you coffee.”

“Ugh… fine, fine but I can’t get up if your finely sculpted form is on top of me,” breathed Tony.

Natasha and Sam showed up an hour later, as a freshly showered Tony and Steve sat at the kitchen table sipping from their mugs and munching on muffins. “You two lovebirds better not be making out when I walk in there,” said Sam jokingly.

“Is that a dare?” responded Tony. Steve covered his face with his hands in an effort to control his laughter.

Natasha entered the kitchen first and grabbed a clean mug, filling it with coffee as she sat next to Tony. She sipped from her mug in silence as she eyed Tony, who was doing his best to avoid her gaze. Sam brought over more muffins and some croissants before sitting down next to Steve.

“Well, today’s the day,” he said to no one in particular.

Tony drank his coffee slowly, only nibbling on his blueberry muffin, as Natasha, Sam, and Steve talked about the logistics of their mission. He enjoyed their company, knowing it would be a long time before he got to see them again, before they’d be able to meet up for breakfast, and even then, there might be a fifth person to break up their quartet. If the others had caught on to his guise, they didn’t let on.

Sam got up first, taking the dirty dishes with him. Steve followed, as they both made their way out to the balcony. Natasha stood up and Tony decided it was his chance to run just as she turned and grabbed him by the wrist.

“Tony… Sit.” She motioned for him to sit across from her. _This conversation was inevitable,_ he thought to himself, so he sighed and took the seat Steve had just vacated.

“Here I was thinking you were going to let me off the hook.”

Natasha laughed. “Nice try, Stark, but no... Have no fear, we’ll return the Captain to you in one piece… More or less.” She smiled softly but it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Nat, I’m fine.”

“Tony, you keep telling yourself that but I _know_ you. I knew you were dying when no one else did. You can’t lie to me. I’m Russian. I suspect you can’t lie to Steve either but he wants to believe you’ll be okay. I know better. He’s never seen you the way I have.”

“Nat, I appreciate your concern – I really do – but I’m –”

“Tony, if you say you’re fine one more time, I will flip this table and drop kick you. You know, Sam’s the one that’s going to be with him. I’ll help them, but I really can’t be in that part of the world too long. I was able to create some new covers after the whole S.H.I.E.L.D. exposé but it isn’t safe for me there.” She pushed her hair out of her face. “I need to be here. It’s not like you’re running the Avengers or anything like that,” she said, giving him a sly smile, which he returned.

“I’m not very good at this, Nat. We talked about it last night. I know he needs to do this…it’s just… It’s selfish to tell him to stay because I – Bucky changes everything...” Then after a moment, added, “I hate not knowing.” He burrowed his head in his hands. Natasha walked over and put her arm around him, kissing his forehead.

“Oh, Tony… I told Steve you’d be upset but I didn’t think it was going to be about _this_. Steve loves you. Will things be different with Bucky around? Sure. For one, Steve will have someone who knows what it’s like to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but that has no bearing on your relationship. He wants _you_. He wants to be with _you_. You need to stop thinking the world is out to get you, because sooner or later, you’ll see to it that it does.”

“Oh, you mean like Ultron?”

Natasha scoffed, massaging her temples as she said, “Tony, are you even listening? Have you already dismissed this conversation because you can’t deal with the fact that your boyfriend is going off to save his best friend. Your best friend did the same thing! Rhodey didn’t even know you were alive!”

She was standing up now, pacing around the kitchen. “Dammit, Tony, have you even tried talking to the one person in your life who knows exactly what this feels like? No, of course you haven’t! You’ve been too busy moping around like a lost puppy! Get it together, Stark, and call Pepper!”

Tony was staring at her intently, thinking to himself, _of course, it seems so obvious now that she’s laid it out like that. Pepper is clearly the best person to talk to… She knows firsthand how to deal with the fallout of someone held against his will, and there’s no question that Bucky had been held against his will._ He hated himself for this. He had been so selfish in the situation that he had failed to see the solution, staring at him…

Tony found himself gawking at Natasha’s gorgeous red hair billowing in the wind, as it entered the kitchen from the balcony, and something must have shown on his face because Natasha sat down across from him and passed him another cup of coffee. He had been so lost in his thoughts; he hadn’t even seen her put on a new pot. “Stark, go build a suit or whatever it is you do to take your mind off shit, just – don’t get into any Formula 1 cars, I think Pepper would hang me if you did.”

The paparazzi would pay millions of dollars to be on the receiving end of the smile Tony flashed Natasha. “Hold on. Is Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, scared of my former PA and the current CEO of my company? FRIDAY, keep this on record.”

“As you wish, boss,” was the last thing he heard before he felt a punch to the shoulder.

“Hey, that’s my boyfriend you’re beating up,” said Steve as he and Sam returned to the kitchen just as Natasha punched Tony’s arm.

“Yeah, well, tell your boyfriend to keep his mouth shut,” responded Natasha still glaring at Tony, who was laughing into his coffee mug.

Sam looked at the three of them and shook his head, laughing. “I don’t even want to know.”


	2. Midmorning

The hours seemed to pass so slowly without Steve around. Tony had to relearn how to be by himself. After things ended with Pepper and she moved out, Tony had found his fair share of distractions to keep him away from the city, and most importantly, away from the empty Tower. Now that Sam, Natasha, and Steve were gone, and there was no reason for him to go to the upstate facility, he found himself alone.

He spent more time in his workshop than he had since joining the Avengers. He had laughed to himself, remembering Natasha’s parting words, when he had started working on some new suits. He upgraded FRIDAY’s software and Natasha’s Widow Bites. He adjusted Sam’s wings. He made Clint new arrows, even though he wasn’t sure when Clint would be able to use them.

After exhausting that route, he had started working on some designs. After about a week of tinkering, he emailed Pepper the schematics; she happily approved them all. It felt good to be absorbed in his work without reproach.

When he wasn’t in the lab, he read up on the latest scientific discoveries. He tried not to chastise himself for falling so far behind. _I’m the futurist. I’m supposed to be ten steps ahead, not struggling to keep up with all of this. How can I make cutting-edge technology if I don’t even know what constitutes as cutting-edge anymore?_

Some nights, as he was making his way back from the kitchen, he’d look over at the balcony, and his mind would conjure up images of an awe-struck Steve, sitting on the balcony and sketching the New York skyline for the hundredth time. When prompted, he’d say that never in a million years had he ever imagined having this view of the city he loved now. Tony would make a quip about seeing it every day and Steve would respond by saying he would never get tired of waking up next to Tony, so he would never tire of sketching the skyline.

Tony hadn’t opened the balcony since Steve left, but on this night, he stepped outside, feeling the brisk wind smack his face. Deciding it was too cold to sit outside comfortably, he closed the door and locked it, opting for a night best spent working.

In an effort to keep true to his promises to both Steve and Natasha, Tony had asked FRIDAY to make sure he had a plan for every waking day.

One morning she woke him up and asked, “Boss, what is the plan for today?”

“Sleep,” said Tony groggily as he turned onto his back and threw a pillow over his head. It was late morning by the look of it, for the sun was filtering in and illuminating the room.

“Wrong answer,” said a voice Tony hadn’t heard in a while. “Before you ask, FRIDAY let me in. She said you needed some encouragement when I called.”

Tony shifted on the bed, removing the pillow from his face and using it to prop himself up. He finally looked up to see Pepper standing in the doorway and she flashed him a small smile. She walked into the room and threw a pair of jeans at him before walking out, closing the door behind her. He took the hint and got dressed.

He walked out in the pair of jeans she had tossed him and a black, form-fitting t-shirt. Deciding it was best not to keep her waiting; he just combed his hair with his fingers and put down his trimmers. He’d have time for that later.

He walked over to the kitchen and saw that she was sitting at the table in the same spot Natasha had been the last time she was here. Their conversation instantly popped into this head. It was hard to believe a few weeks had passed since then. Pepper passed him a cup of coffee as he sat down in front of her, and she continued drinking from her own mug.

“Talk to me, Tony. You haven’t been to the office in at least a month. I know you don’t have to be there, but it’s not like you to be this distant…” She looked up to see him looking down at his coffee. He hadn’t even touched it. “Tony, it’s in the kitty mug and everything,” she eyed him worriedly. He took a sip, and deciding a sip wasn’t enough, he took a gulp, then looked up and gave Pepper a shy smile.

“Pepper, what time is it?”

“Tony, it’s around 11: 30, but that doesn’t matter.”

“Pepper, what day is it?”

“Saturday.”

“Shouldn’t we be having brunch instead?”

“We’re not drinking. You’re definitely not drinking. I should’ve come sooner. I’m sorry.” She got up out of her seat and deposited her cup in the sink before walking toward the living room. Tony vacillated for a moment before getting up and following her, mug still in his hand. She plopped down on the couch and kicked her heels off. “Tony, when was the last time you saw a human?”

Still standing in the middle of the room, he looked at his hands, not wishing to meet her eyes. “The last person I saw was Steve.”

Pepper blinked in horror and quickly walked over, barefoot, to stand in front of him. She held him at arm’s length. He looked older, more tired, and there were a few new scrapes on his cheeks, which she attributed to whatever he was working on now. She wrapped her arms around his waist, placing her head on his chest where the arc reactor would have been, and breathed in. She could hear the steady beat of his heart and had to fight back tears. “Oh, Tony! Steve’s been gone for weeks. I should’ve known you were sequestering yourself. You never respond to my emails so quickly.”

He looked down at her and played with her hair, twirling it between his fingers as if he were holding a screwdriver. She didn’t seem to notice nor care and moved back so she could meet his eyes. He saw that they were glossy and he pulled back, crossing his arms. “Pepper, why are you here?”

Hurt flashed across her face as she responded, “Tony, FRIDAY reached out to me because she was worried. I already had my fears but hearing it from her, I knew it was bad. I came over because I thought you could use company. Central Park looks beautiful this time of year. We could go out for a walk. You could tell me what’s on your mind and I could tell you what’s been going on with the company. We could talk, probably grab a bite to eat, and along the way, I’d remind you that you’re not alone. You have me. You will always have me.” She reached for his hand, “Tony, I have always loved you too.”

He dropped his hand and sighed deeply. “Pepper, this is a fine line we’re walking.”

“No, it isn’t. I was the one who ended things and I’m not looking to get back together. I know that we keep up appearances because it’s what you want. Trust me; I understand very well why you and Steve don’t want to come out to the public just yet. God knows I would never pressure you into doing something with which you’re not comfortable but Tony, please; don’t turn away from my affection because you’re scared. I’m looking out for you because that’s what I’ve always done, and even when it was my job, I did it because I wanted to, not just because I had to, and now… Now, I do it because I care about you. Please stop trying to drive me – and everyone else – away. It’s very frustrating.”

She had grabbed his shoulders and forced him to look her in the eye. He sighed again and spoke softly, “Pepper, I miss him. I miss you. I miss having something to do like team meetings, training sessions, going on missions. Fuck, I miss Fury – that sly bastard. I haven’t had a chance to talk to Rhodey, who’s busy actually doing something.”

She was about to cut him off but he interjected. “I know what you’re going to say – I’ve been working and it’s been fun, focusing on my work like that, but I can’t really think straight. I haven’t heard from them and it’s killing me. I don’t know if they’re alive or dead. I don’t know if they’ve found Bucky or not. I don’t know anything about this mission and I hate being out of the loop. I’m sure they have their reasons for not keeping in contact, but I can’t help but feel useless. What’s the point of being a superhero if you can’t help the people you love because you’re a literal mess and even your robots have caught on to it,” he finished dramatically.

Pepper started to say something, thought better of it, quietly walked over to the sofa where she had been sitting moments ago, and motioned for Tony to join her. “You’re not useless and you’re the one who programmed your robots – they keep an eye on you because, for as self-sacrificial as you are, a small part of you also wants to survive.” She smiled warmly as he sat next to her and nuzzled into her open arms. She hugged him and played with his hair. “You have two options, Mr. Stark,” she said in her professional voice, “either we can watch reruns of Star Trek or we can go outside and let the paparazzi take pictures of us in Central Park as we eat gelato or something equally delicious.”

Without moving, he said, “Gelato sounds good.” Moments later, he looked up and eyed her deviously. Then at the last second, kissed her cheek and said, “Thank you, Pep.” She couldn’t help but blush as she moved so he could get up.

He walked back to the bedroom, and moments later, heard Pepper approach. She was standing in the doorway, the sun filtering in and illuminating her face. Her long hair glistening as it framed her face, falling well past her shoulders. It occurred to Tony that she hadn’t cut it in a while.

She smiled softly. “Ready?”

She looked at him tentatively, waiting for his response. She didn’t want to pressure him. He turned to look at her apprehensively. “Give me a few.”

He walked into the master bathroom as he motioned for her to sit on the bed. She opted to roam around the room instead. Presumably, Tony had pushed open the long, thick black drapes, allowing the light and the view to filter into the majestic bedroom. At this angle and from this height, most of the city was visible. On the right side, there was a soft white armchair with a silky black pillow on it and a matching ottoman at its feet. Her mind conjured images of Tony sitting there, looking out the window, with a tablet in his hand, and his feet propped on the ottoman. She couldn’t help but smile.

The top dresser drawer was open. Pepper peered in to see what it contained. Tony had neatly folded his ties, organized by color. Pepper could envision him in the middle of the afternoon, standing in front of the dresser half dressed as he talked into his headset, folding the ties. On top of the dresser were his cufflinks and watches, as were a few bottles of half-used colognes. She noticed a few that hadn’t been there before. Realization dawned on her: they must be Steve’s colognes.

She walked to the opposite side of the room, toward the bed and away from the window, and saw that the door to the walk-in closet was open. Along one wall, she saw nothing but suits, tuxedos, and dress shoes. There were a few loafers and sneakers in their midst. The opposite wall, which at one point held her clothes, probably contained Steve’s clothing.

In some ways, it was nice to see the hints of domesticity scattered throughout but it was also odd to know this had once been her home. Having been lost in thought, she didn’t hear Tony saying “Ready” as he stepped out of the bathroom.

When she finally turned around, she saw Tony bemusedly staring at her. “I should probably donate some of those. Since I’m no longer CEO, it’s not like I need to wear a suit every day.”

“Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have gone in there.” She took him in. He looked so much more like himself now than when she had first arrived. He was wearing a deep blue shirt with the top two buttons open, a black vest, dark jeans, and black loafers. It occurred to her that wearing heels on a walk through Central Park was a little ridiculous, but she hadn’t been sure what to expect when she was getting dressed. She still wasn’t entirely convinced Tony had actually agreed to go on this little excursion but she wasn’t going to press the point.

Tony laughed. “Don’t worry; I’ve got nothing to hide. You’ve already seen me naked.”

Pepper blushed; her cheeks the color of paprika as she walked out of the room. She briefly turned to see Tony hunched over laughing just as she shut the door. She couldn’t help but grin though, because it was nice to hear him laugh.

They bid FRIDAY farewell and walked to the elevator. Considering the time of day, they were pleasantly surprised to ride by themselves the majority of the way down. Reaching the front doors, Tony could see the leaves on the floor. There was no mistaking it: autumn had arrived.

Tony had opted for a hot dog from one of the stands outside the Tower, saying if they were going to snap photos of him, he might as well look like a true New Yorker. Pepper laughed into her pretzel and nodded in agreement. As they walked, Tony listened attentively to Pepper’s stories. She told him about the company and its day-to-day activities. She filled him in on things she couldn’t communicate in their daily emails, omitting how often people asked her about him. _He’s okay now. It’s not a lie anymore._

Tony told her about his work. The things he had designed, the new systems he had put in place and the upgrades he had made to existing software. She only stopped him to ask clarifying questions. He informed her he had also tweaked the Avengers’ weapons and armors.

It felt nice to talk to another human. He had spent weeks surrounded by his robots, whom he loved like children, but even they couldn’t replace human interaction. Pepper’s presence filled part of the void present since Steve’s departure and he relished in her company. However, he neglected to tell her about the suits he had constructed in Steve’s wake.

They were walking along 59th Street, when the first cameras flashed. Tony wrapped his arm around Pepper’s shoulders and leaned into her ear, whispering, “I guess they found us.”

She looked up at him and smiled. “Took them long enough. We’ve been walking in plain view for at least an hour.”

“Cut them some slack. I’m a rare sight these days, they’ve probably been following us for a few blocks,” said Tony, as he kissed her cheek. 

A few hours later, they found themselves comfortably seated on the sofa in the Tower, overlooking the sun hanging low in the sky, visible through the windows. Tony was petting her hair as she drank from a glass of wine. A half-empty bottle sat a few feet away from them on the coffee table.

“I should be leaving. Unlike you, I actually have to get up and put a suit on every morning,” said Pepper. “Should I say ‘sorry’ or ‘you’re welcome’?” asked Tony, jokingly.

Had things been different, he would’ve asked her to stay but he knew it wasn’t right or fair to anyone involved, so he didn’t protest. Moreover, she could always come back if she wished. For her, his door was always open. He walked her to the door. As she was leaving, Pepper turned around to say, “I promise I won’t be a stranger.”

“Pep, you’re not. I’ll see you soon,” responded Tony, and with that, he hugged her goodnight.

“FRIDAY, lock up.”

“As you wish, boss. Shall I inform you the next time Ms. Potts makes a surprise appearance?”

“Yes – actually, no. No, if I know she’s coming… No, it’s fine. Goodnight, FRIDAY.”

“Are you actually going to sleep or is this merely a ploy to get me to leave you alone?”

“Both. Now stop asking questions,” he said as he picked up Pepper’s wine glass, dumping out both its contents and what was left of the wine she had been drinking down the drain. He didn’t need more temptations tonight.

“I’m not in the mood for this right now, FRIDAY. I’m going to sleep.”

“Shall I wake you in the morning then, boss?”

“Yes. Now, goodnight,” said Tony, curtly.

*~*~*~*~*~

“Welcome home, Ms. Romanoff,” said FRIDAY in an unusually cheery voice just as the earliest glimmer of sunlight was making its way through the thick drapes, obscuring what would have been a fantastic view of Manhattan so early in the morning.

Natasha walked into the living room slowly, carefully taking in the vista in front of her as she parted the curtains and let the light permeate the room. She had had more than her fill of dark, secluded rooms. All her years as a spy had taught her to be as cool as a cucumber. Had she wanted, she could have made a grand entrance; she knew Tony was expecting her and that she’d have to answer all his questions in a few hours.

“Thank you. It’s good to be back in the states. Say, is Tony still awake by any chance?”

“No, boss fell asleep a few hours ago.”

_Oh, interesting. It seems Tony does sleep when no one else is around… Maybe he needed some time for himself,_ she thought.

“Shall I wake him, Ms. Romanoff?”

“No, FRIDAY, that won’t be necessary… I’m not leaving any time soon. I’ll just settle down. He’ll wake up eventually.”

She walked down the hall, past Tony's room. She could hear his breathing – light and steady, reminiscent of the arc reactor.

She pushed her key code. She had left the door locked. She doubted Tony would have had reason to come in anyway, but secrecy was second nature to her: once a spy, always a spy. She turned the knob. The room was quiet, empty.

Natasha dropped her bags beside her bed and sank into the mattress. It felt nice to lie on something soft, to feel the pillows on the back of her head, to spread her arms like wings through the sheets. It was nice to be... Home. _It’s a good thing Stark’s a billionaire because I couldn’t afford these sheets_ , she thought and chuckled.

Rather than get lost in her thoughts, she started to undress and put on a pair of Hawkeye pajamas Clint had bought her as a joke. They were surprisingly comfortable and she yearned for the comforts of home after such a long mission. _There it was again,_ she thought, _this idea of being home... Natalia, are you getting soft?_ She sighed loudly and mostly to herself. Promptly ignoring her thoughts, she quickly reorganized her drawers as she unpacked, putting her things away as she did everything else: methodically.

By the time she left her room, the sun was high up in the sky, an iridescent blue that reminded her of Steve's eyes. She made her way across the penthouse to the kitchen to make a pot of coffee for herself. The coffeemaker was the only thing that looked like it had been in use. "Stark loves his coffee," she said under her breath, humorously.

Her eyes wandered over to the kitchen table. Her mind was flooded with images of the last time she had sat there, talking to Tony. _I have to talk to Pepper._

Just then, the machine made a small hissing noise. She pulled the mug from underneath and began drinking from it as she walked to the couch.

She couldn’t help but think of Tony. She thought of him sitting at the kitchen table by himself, bickering with FRIDAY, as she nagged him over sleep, food, work, or some combination of the three. Natasha quickly realized she had missed him. She had missed his company, and oddly enough, his friendship. _Natalia, you are getting soft._

She thought of waking Tony but decided she'd let him sleep a little longer. The man hardly slept as it was. She knew him well enough from her time at SI but living with him had only confirmed that his insomnia was both a coping mechanism and a bad habit. In any case, she thought, waking him up was cruel.

She sat on the couch, becoming one with the pillows, and turned on the TV. It had been a long time since she had been able to just sit and relax without a mission looming over her head. _Natalia, don’t lie: this mission is still looming over your head but for a very different reason._

Either way, sitting in the comfort of her home – _again, that word_ – was nice. Surreal, but nice. 

After five minutes of scrolling through the guide had resulted in only irritated groans, she gave up. "Hundreds of channels and there's never anything good," she said in rapid Russian as she turned off the screen and tossed the remote out of reach.

It was almost a quarter to ten. Natasha had decided Stark had slept enough.

"FRIDAY, is Tony still sleeping?" she asked as she flipped an egg and served it. She didn't make breakfast often but she thought the occasion called for more than just waffles.

"Boss is still sleeping," responded the AI.

"Good. It's time for breakfast," she said to FRIDAY as she made her way to Tony's room, a steaming cup of coffee in her hands.

She walked into the room and parted the curtains. "Rise and shine, Anthony." Tony stirred awake, the smell of coffee bringing a sly smile to his lips.

"I'm either having déjà vu or I died in my sleep because there’s no way another beautiful redhead has come to wake me up with coffee."

Surprise quickly flashed across her face but she didn’t press. She gently walked over and placed the mug on the night table closest to Tony. He sat up and reached over to pick it up, inhaling its delicious aroma before taking a sip. “I know spiders like to play with their food,” he said, coy, “but Pepper already beat you to this yesterday.”

Natasha smiled. “I’m not looking for blood today, Tony.”

Tony let out a sigh of relief. “Well, if you don’t have some ulterior motive then I must’ve done something wrong –”

Natasha cut him off. “Tony,” she groaned into her palm, “God – I need to talk to you so I thought you’d appreciate some coffee. If I had wanted to kill you, you’d be dead. I’ve been home for hours.”

Upon hearing that, Tony straightened up. Before he had a chance to respond, Natasha was walking out the door. “Just get dressed, I made breakfast.” He looked just as surprised as he had been that day at the diner with Fury.

Minutes later, he reappeared wearing black sweatpants and a form-fitting black tank top. As he strode into the kitchen, he noticed the dark circles under Natasha’s eyes and made a mental note of them. He sat across from her, took one look at his breakfast, and grinned. He settled for honesty instead of one of his usual quips when he responded by saying, “Thank you, Nat.”

She returned his smile and said to him, “Do you want to start?” He sighed, took one last sip of his coffee, and then recounted his adventure with Pepper. She silently ate her breakfast, as he talked, only moving to refill their mugs.

“Ok, so now that you’ve heard my story, it’s your turn,” pleaded Tony, not taking his brown eyes off Natasha’s vivid, unreadable green ones. Natasha put her mug down.

“Fair enough, but you better eat,” she said, pointing at his food. He willingly obliged. “Based on my intel, Hungary was the best place to start our search, so we formulated a plan. We were trying to keep a low profile. As you know, this was a covert op. We were doing this without S.H.I.E.L.D. and without the Avengers, so we flew as civilians on commercial jets. I had aliases for the boys and I used one of my lesser known covers.”

At that point, Tony raised a brow. “Didn’t you make all your covers known when you exposed S.H.I.E.L.D.?”

Natasha eyed him incredulously. “Stark, I’m disappointed. You really thought those were my only covers or that I was incapable of creating new identities?” She raised her mug to her lips, taking in a sip, the expression in her eyes unreadable to Tony.

“Right. Super spy. Continue.”

“To minimize the possibility of somebody tracking us, we took different flights. I left from JFK and flew to Prague with a connection in Lisbon. Steve left from Newark and flew to Vienna with a connection in Paris. Sam took a bus up to Buffalo and flew to Berlin. We regrouped in Budapest. I took a train from the Czech Republic, Steve took a boat down the Danube, and Sam took a plane from Germany. From there, we were undercover. I had some favors to pull, so I called them in. As you can imagine, the ride to the Hydra base was tense. Steve’s emotions were transparent… to the trained eye,” a smirk tugging on her lips as she took a break to drink from her cup, “Sam kept him distracted. I had my eyes on our driver and the road.”

Tony was eyeing Natasha intensely. She got up unexpectedly and walked over to the coffeemaker, pouring its remnants into her mug and taking a sip. “I’d offer but you hate cold coffee.”

Without a moment’s hesitation, Tony walked over to her, taking the mug from her hands, and dumping the contents into the sink. “For a woman who’s made a name for herself by weaving a web of lies, you expect me to believe you’ll drink cold coffee,” he said as he started to make another batch. “I call bullshit.”

Natasha just crossed her arms across her chest and laughed at his response. This time, the smiled reached her eyes. Tony took her hand in his, no trace of humor remaining on his handsome features, and said, “I think it’s time you finished your story, Ms. Romanoff,” as he motioned for her to sit back down, which she did. He followed closely behind, resuming his position across the table from her, a fresh cup of coffee in his hand.

“It took three days to make it to the Hydra base but we took them out in a few hours. Sam and Steve were the ones to find Bucky. I did some reconnaissance and went back to the safe house, our rendezvous point. Now, –” she sighed heavily, taking a longer sip from her cup, “up to this point, there was nothing out of the ordinary…”

She tilted her head up as she leaned back, letting her hair fall behind her shoulders, the copper undertones visible and glistening in the light coming in through the open window. “I fell in love with a man named James. He was daring and charismatic and he made me forget the hell we called home. He was there... in the Red Room. He trained me. He made me the Black Widow and until a few weeks ago, I didn’t know he was the Winter Soldier.”

Tony stared at Natasha, dumbfounded. For a moment, the loquacious Tony Stark was speechless. Natasha could see the way the gears in his mind turning like a well-oiled machine as he made all the necessary connections.

“I didn’t know James and Bucky were one and the same. I knew Bucky was the Winter Soldier but… he had always been James to me. What happened between us, it was – it was a fairy tale romance, but I’m not a princess and he’s not a prince, and this was never supposed to be my life.”

To the untrained eye, Natasha was calm and composed, but Tony knew this was difficult for her. The spider didn’t divulge her secrets often and when she did, she relinquished them with great care. That she had chosen to trust Tony with this spoke volumes.

He reached across the table and lightly touched her palm. She didn’t flinch away, so he held her hand in his.

“We spent the next few weeks helping him cope with his captivity. The brainwashing, the return of his memories, the overwhelming guilt. I learned that the time we had spent together was the longest he had ever been away from the clutches of those men,” said Natasha, speaking into her other palm.

“I woke up one morning and he – he was already awake. He saw me and said ‘Good morning, Natalia’ in Russian and I – I didn’t know what to say. It was the first time he had called me by name.”

She ran her hands through her hair as she spoke. Tony eyed her apprehensively as he drained the last bit of his coffee and pondered whether he had had too many cups in one morning.

“So, what happened next?” asked Tony.

Natasha stood up and placed her empty mug in the sink. Tony followed suit as she led him to the sofa, and sat down next to him.

“You once asked me what I would do on my last birthday and I said I’d do whatever I wanted with whomever I wanted,” she eyed him worriedly.

Tony bowed his head in shame. That birthday had been a disaster. He had been a mess and had only made things worse. He knew his drinking had gone too far. He was too hungover to remember the party itself, but he remembered that conversation. He realized now that that had been Natalia speaking, imparting words of wisdom – not Natasha, and definitely not Natalie. He sat up and turned to look at her.

She was lying back against the pillows, a sea of red sprouting from the top of her head, her eyes unreadable. “That night, I told you the truth. I just didn’t know who that lucky person would be,” she laughed derisively at herself. “I had once thought – thought that maybe it was Clint. But it has always been James.”

She turned to face Tony, who was still looking at her. Her green eyes met his rich brown ones.

“Nat… I – I used to think it would be Pepper. Always. Now… now, I’m certain it’s Steve. Does – does Bucky know any of this?”

She nodded. “Yes, we spoke just before I left.”

For the first time since the conversation began, Tony recognized the expression that flashed across her delicate features: sadness. The effect was only fleeting. Tony, taken aback by how quickly she could close herself off, didn’t say anything. She had been so honest with him; it seemed out of place to judge her. After all, they were friends, but she would always be a spy – a covert agent who had flirted with both sides of the law. The irony that she loved a man who had done the same wasn’t lost on Tony; he merely made a note of it.

Moments later, she continued speaking as if she hadn’t bared her soul to him.

“The boys will be home later this week. Steve has his best friend back but… Steve was asleep for a few decades, James was awake – a weapon at the whim of Hydra. He’s not the same man he once was. He’s not the man Steve saw fall out of a plane. He’s not the same man that taught me how to aim.” She took a deep breath. “He’s alive. If that’s good enough for Steve, you damn well know that’s good enough for me,” she said rather harshly.

She grounded herself, breathing slowly through her nose before she continued. “Listen Stark, I’ve been awake all night, I’m going to sleep,” she said, some of the bitterness in her voice gone, “I won’t – can’t – be here when they get back. I’m going upstate on Wednesday.”

With that, the most reclusive and guarded of the Avengers made her way back to her room. Tony watched her the whole way, a tightness in his chest that he couldn’t immediately explain.

“Well, I’ll be damned, FRIDAY. There really are ghosts,” he said.

“It would seem that is the case, boss. I have alerted Ms. Potts of Ms. Romanoff’s return.”

“Thank you, FRIDAY,” said Tony just before he started swimming in his thoughts as he made his way down to the workshop.

*~*~*~*~*~

It was late Monday afternoon by the time he emerged from his lab, sweaty and covered in grease. He made a beeline for the kitchen and saw that someone had made a pot of coffee earlier. It took him a few moments to remember that Natasha was back but there was no sign of her on this floor. Memories of the conversation they had had the day before replayed in his mind.

“FRIDAY, where’s Ms. Romanoff?” he said worriedly.

“She’s in the gymnasium, boss, but she’s not alone,” said FRIDAY, in a voice he knew he hadn’t programmed but couldn’t ascertain.

_Oh, that’s… interesting._ “Who’s with her?” he said his curiosity piquing.

“Ms. Potts,” said FRIDAY.

“Well, why didn’t you tell me Pepper was here?” he replied, slightly annoyed. 

“On Saturday morning you told me I didn’t have to inform you when Ms. Potts showed up,” retorted the AI. She sounded a little flustered.

Tony stopped drinking out of his mug for a moment, trying to recall the conversation, tiredness sweeping over him. “Ok, fair enough.”

“She specifically asked to see Ms. Romanoff when she arrived.” 

The thought of the two most powerful women he knew talking over punching bags was downright terrifying. As he placed his empty cup in the sink, he noticed the two mugs that were already there. Their presence confirmed FRIDAY’s story, not that he had doubted her.

“I advise against going down there, boss.”

“Yeah, yeah… I’m still going down there.”

Tony walked down to the gymnasium slowly. He had told FRIDAY he was going to go down anyway, but he was rethinking his decision as he approached Natasha’s training room and he heard grunts coming from behind the door.

He debated whether to knock or just walk right in. He also rethought his decision to come down disheveled. _Well, it’s not as if they haven’t seen me like this before. Hell, they woke me up with coffee just days ago…_

In the end, he opted for the latter option. He walked into the training room quietly, which turned out to be the right call for at first they didn’t notice him.

Even though Tony knew it was her, it took him a moment to realize it was Pepper. _Was she wearing… a tracksuit? An all-white tracksuit? Huh, today just keeps getting more interesting._ The form-fitting outfit left little to the imagination, but then again, Tony’s imagination was very vivid – as were his memories – but he pushed those particular thoughts aside.

_Stark, now’s not the time to think about your ex-girlfriend in that capacity. Actually, it’s never a good time to think about your ex-girlfriend, or anyone, like that unless… Unless that person is Steve. Dammit, Steve._

In that brief moment, yearning for the man he loved overwhelmed him. _God, I’m so gone._

He ignored the tightness in his chest as he thought of Steve in a form-fitting outfit, sweat emanating from every pore as he punched a bag to oblivion, when he took in Natasha.

Beads of sweat trailed down her hairline. Her hair, pulled back into a sleek ponytail, swung from side to side as she punched the bag hanging in the middle of the room. Her fiery red hair looked like an out-of-control flame. However, even with a face flushed with color, she still managed to look poised and very much in control.

She was wearing skin-tight black yoga pants that reached her ankles, which only served to accentuate her muscular thighs, and a Black Widow muscle shirt, courtesy of Clint. Her bright red sports bra was clearly visible from the exposed sides of her top. Her muscular arms glistened with a thin layer of sweat.

Tony wondered for a moment if this is the Nat – Natalia – Bucky had met. If that had been the case, Tony thought, it was no wonder they fell in love. She was in her element. She was born a fighter and it had never been clearer to Tony. It was then that Natasha turned around and eyed him suspiciously.

She stopped punching the bag for a moment and swiftly removed her gloves, as did Pepper, although she fumbled a bit in the process.

“You just had to know what we were doing,” said Natasha in mock annoyance. A brief smile flashed across her lips.

“I’m sorry, Tony. I should've had FRIDAY tell you I was here… You saw the coffee mugs in the sink and came down?” said Pepper, concerned.

“Relax, Pep. I knew it was a matter of time. I told FRIDAY to tell you Nat had returned…” at that, Pepper looked down. It took Tony a moment to understand, “Wait… Nat, when did you tell her you were back?” he asked, flummoxed.

Natasha responded, highly amused, “Well, considering I boarded one of your jets, I’m surprised _you_ didn’t know I was coming back. Pepper helped me book the flight but…” her tone softened, “I appreciate your concern,” she said as she hugged him.

Tony couldn’t complain about the sweat. He was covered in sweat himself, tinged with more than its fair share of grease, but the gesture took him aback.

Sensing the awkwardness, Pepper came over and properly greeted him. “I think we should shower and go out for dinner.”

Tony eyed Pepper curiously. She met his glance and sighed, answering his unasked question. “I freed my schedule. I’m available all day.”

A devilish grin appeared on his grease-covered face. “All day with the two women who could literally kill me in my sleep –”

“Oh, Tony… you don’t get have the privilege of dying in your sleep,” said Natasha, barking with laughter. Fleetingly, fear crossed his face but Pepper just smiled as she joined him on their way out of the gym and patted him on the back.

“She means well.”

*~*~*~*~*~

It was late Monday night.

“I did miss New York,” said Natasha, sprawled across the couch, a glass of wine in her hand. Her long, luminous red hair was a stark contrast against the lily-white pillows. She was wearing a hip-hugging, long-sleeved, knee-length, cable-knit sweater dress that brought out her eyes. Slim, high-heeled, thigh-high black leather boots hugged her calves. Draped behind her was a black leather jacket she had taken off after they had returned from their lunch date. Her black clutch leaning against the cushions on her left.

Curled against Natasha’s right shoulder was Pepper, holding a glass to her lips as she drank. Her strawberry blonde hair in a high ponytail. She was wearing dark jeans and a button-down blouse the color of champagne. Her feet hung off the side, her perfectly manicured toes visible. Her Manolo Blahnik pumps lay discarded next to Natasha’s things, a small duffle bag and her matching handbag nestled in the pillows.

“I thought you came in workout clothes,” said Tony as he took a sip of apple cider.

“Oh no, I changed when I got here. I’m a CEO of a Fortune 500 company, Tony, I can’t let the press see me in workout clothes,” said Pepper as she eyed him looking at her belongings.

Tony sat across from them, cross-legged and sprawled out, the seat next to him empty, and eyed them wistfully. “So, Romanoff, how long has this been going on and why is it that I’m only finding out now? Since you came back, I’ve learned so much about your love life. It’s quite remarkable, actually.” He sat up, adjusting the pillows behind him, smirking as Natasha’s eyes met his, her expression unreadable. He laughed. “Pep?”

Pepper sat up, fixing her blouse and readjusting her position, trying to find a comfortable angle now that she was no longer leaning on Natasha for support. “Tony, it doesn’t concern you.”

Tony, practically bouncing with glee, responded, “A- _ha!_ But there _is_ something then…”

Natasha rolled her eyes. “She’s good company. It’s nice to get away from all the testosterone in this building.”

Natasha smiled softly at Pepper, who returned the expression and giggled into her glass.

“Oh my God, you two are going to kill me. You’re going to have to answer to Steve you know. He’ll want to know why I died. Then you’ll –”

“Oh Tony, shut up. Nat and I just like spending time with each other. We’ve been around you and the other Avengers for years, few people can say the same,” said Pepper in mock frustration.

“Fine, but what’s going to happen now?” said Tony, all hints of mockery gone.

Natasha looked at Pepper, who shrugged. “Nothing. We’re friends. But I – I need to wait until James comes back to talk to him…”

“I thought you had talked before you left,” replied Tony.

“Yes, well, it’s not like one conversation is enough and in any case, I won’t be the only one to have one with a super soldier,” said Natasha, Pepper’s ears perking up.

“Tony, what – what’s going on with you and Steve?” said Pepper, concern etched across her delicate features.

Tony leaned into the pillows, drowning the last of his cider. “I’m hoping he still wants to be with me. I’m hoping he still loves me. Mostly, I’m hoping… I’m hoping he’s okay.”

He stood up, gathered their empty glasses, and brought them to the sink. As he was walking out of the kitchen, a glass of water in his hand, he could see that Pepper had resumed her position next to Natasha. The spy was kissing Pepper’s forehead and twirling her hair in her fingers. He couldn’t discern what Natasha was murmuring but deduced it was something in Russian. Then, Natasha caressed her cheek and tilted her chin, kissing her passionately.

The moment was short-lived for the sound of breaking glass made them quickly pull apart. Tony stood transfixed, unable to take his eyes off the sight before him.

A playful smile played on Natasha’s lips but she didn’t say a word. Seeing that Tony hadn’t found his voice, Pepper walked over and started picking up the shards of glass that lay scattered. Tony bent down to help her. “Oh, get over yourself. I’ve seen you kiss Steve hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, but –”

“Oh, don’t you dare say ‘not like that’ because you know that’s a lie,” responded Pepper sharply.

Natasha had come over to help mop up the water that was quickly seeping into the carpet. The glint in her eyes was mischievous but she didn’t dare speak.

Having regained the use of his vocal cords, Tony said, “Now that we’ve all kissed each –”

“Wait… _What_? When did you and Nat kiss?” said Pepper flabbergasted.

Natasha responded, “Oh, it was one time. The night of his disastrous birthday party –”

“ _Oh_ , you mean the birthday party at which you were so drunk you made yourself look like a complete buffoon?” said Pepper, giving Tony a reproachful look.

“Please tell me it was before, at least,” she said looking at Natasha and decidedly not meeting Tony’s eyes.

“Wait, you’re not even mad?” said Tony, taken aback.

Pepper smiled. ”Oh, sweetie, why would I be mad? We pretend to be together for the cameras but you have Steve and for the moment, Nat and I have each other. Besides, you missed your chance… with both of us,” she said coyly.

She stood to throw out the shards she had in her hand. Natasha followed closely behind, putting away the mop she had used to clean up. She pulled her in for a hug, grabbing her by the waist from behind and nuzzling between her shoulders.

Tony, still in the doorway, turned away, leaving the two women to melt into each other’s arms as he contemplated all the things he had learned.

In his stupor, he had failed to realize that the mission would affect Pepper too; that she needed someone too. It had been clear that night she had come over. It was obvious now that although she had sought his company, he had wanted Steve, and she had wanted Natasha.

As he thought it over, Natasha’s comments about Pepper that morning before she left suddenly seemed to make more sense.

“Pepper,” he called out, “you’re more than welcome to stay.” He didn’t wait for a reply as he walked down the stairs, removing his tie and unbuttoning his dress shirt before tossing them on the sofa and making his way down to his workshop in his black tank top and jeans.

“FRIDAY, did you know this was going on?” said Tony as he keyed in his code and the doors to the workshop swung open.

“Boss, I know everything that goes on in the Tower, but my privacy settings forbid me from discussing these things with those who are not privy,” responded the AI in her usual manner.

“I really should’ve seen this coming,” said Tony, disappointed in himself.

“It was quite obvious if you knew where to look,” responded FRIDAY, pleased with herself.

“Ok, enough gloating. Now I have three women telling me I’m not observant enough and one of whom I built,” retorted Tony, resigned. He tried not to wonder what the two women upstairs were doing or where when FRIDAY spoke again. “You built me to remind you to get to work, boss.”

“Duly noted, FRIDAY,” said Tony as he began to work on his armor with music blasting throughout the room, muffling any noise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are more Tony and Natasha feels in chapter 3.


	3. Evening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's been a hundred years since I've updated. This chapter is short, but I wanted to get it out. I've re-written it a number of time but I'm happy with what I have here.

“Sleeping Beauty, it’s time to wake up,” said Rhodey, only slightly annoyed. He was standing at the foot of Tony’s bed, a duffel bag at his feet. Tony opened one eye and sat up when he saw who it was.

“Sorry, I was expecting a redhead,” said Tony. Rhodey eyed him quizzically, “Let’s just say, this isn’t the first time this week I’ve woken up to someone at the foot of my bed… Hey, where’s the coffee?” Rhodey pointed to the still-steaming mug of coffee on the night table next to him. “Perfect,” responded Tony leaning over to pick it up. He cupped it tightly and took a sip, savoring the bitterness on his tongue. In the meantime, Rhodey pushed open the blinds.

“Shit, did I sleep all day again?” said Tony sitting up. He was staring out the window. Twilight had crept up on him as he slept. Rhodey sat down on the bed and turned to face Tony. “FRIDAY said you’d been working for a few days straight. She said you passed out just before dawn.”

“Well, fuck,” responded Tony, running his fingers through his hair as he crawled out of bed. _I should probably shower._

Rhodey continued talking as Tony finished his coffee. “Natasha had called me on Sunday to let me know she was back. She said she was taking a few days off before heading back up. I told her I was leaving for California – the Air Force has some new recruits they want me to train – and that I’d be coming down to say my goodbyes before departing. She said there was room in the Tower since both Sam and Steve are still in Europe. I took her up on the offer.”

Tony frowned, “Why didn’t you call me?”

“To be honest, I didn’t know where you were. You have a habit of disappearing when you don’t want to deal with shit. Part of me thought you had ditched New York for the sun and surf. Oh, don’t look at me like that,” said Rhodey. Tony had been glaring at him. “You always leave for the West Coast when you’re tired and don’t want to deal with shit. Pepper and I still talk, you know. She told me you needed to get out of the Tower, so I figured I’d drop by and surprise you. I expected to find you in your workshop not asleep,” he said.

Tony was still eyeing him, curiously.

“I’m going to ignore your stares, Tones. You don’t get to be upset. It’s not like you called me or came up to visit. I’ve been busy and I’m not your babysitter. Frankly, neither is Pepper, even though she still checks up on you to make sure you haven’t drowned yourself in whisky or a set your workshop on fire. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had FRIDAY keep tabs on when and what you eat.”

Tony didn’t know how to respond, so he kept pacing while Rhodey went on, “Pepper and I, we’re your friends, Tony, but you’re also our friend. Start acting like it. Whatever, listen – I didn’t come here to argue,” said Rhodey, resigned.

Tony sighed, “Yeah, I’ve been getting that a lot.”

“I’m sorry, Rhodey, I’ve been a shitty friend.” Rhodey walked over and hugged him, as he patted him on the back. “You’re so lucky we like you. Really, you’d be dead without us.” Tony quickly looked down, unable to meet Rhodey’s eyes. Rhodey stopped himself, “Shit… that – that’s not what I meant.”

“I know, I know. Doesn’t mean it isn’t true though,” responded Tony. He grabbed his tower and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. Rhodey stood, grounded in his spot, momentarily transfixed, before he grabbed his bag from the floor and walked out the door.

Tony heard him shut the door as he turned on the shower.

“FRIDAY, is he still here?”

“Colonel Rhodes hasn’t vacated the premises, boss. He’s in Mr. Wilson’s room.”

_Good, he hasn’t left._

Tony took his time showering. He washed his hair, cherishing the feel of the hot water on his tired and aching muscles, as he rinsed. He leaned his forehead against the cool tile, quietly listening to the sounds the jets made as they landed on his back. After a few moments, he toweled off and got out. He put on a pair of jeans and a Pink Floyd t-shirt before walking out of the room, hoping to join Rhodey.

He walked into the kitchen. There was still coffee on the pot. _That’s probably the batch Rhodey made before waking me up. Why am I such a jerk sometimes?_ He walked over to it, breathing in its aroma before pulling a mug from the cupboard. At that moment, Rhodey walked back in and sat at the breakfast nook. “I heard the door of your room open, figured you were done.”

Tony took another deep breath, “I’m sorry, Rhodey, I really am.”

“Tony, drop it…” He got up to get a glass of water. When he sat back down, he said, “I went to visit Pepper at her office this afternoon before coming here. She and Natasha were having lunch. Did – did you know about them?” Tony choked on his coffee. Rhodey had to stop himself from laughing. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“If you count catching them making out right over there,” said Tony, pointing to where Natasha and Pepper had been standing, “then yeah, I knew.”

“Well, damn. Guess we never stood a chance. I mean – you had Pepper. I meant –” It was Tony’s turn to suppress a laugh. “Yeah, yeah… the sexy Russian spy.”

“How serious is it?” said Rhodey, his curiosity getting the best of him. Tony shrugged, “No idea, depends on how things go with Barnes.” At that, Rhodey turned to face him. Tony knew that wasn’t the response he had expected.

“Turns out, he and Natasha have a history,” said Tony as he took another sip, leaning against the counter top. Rhodey let out a deep breath, “Well, shit. Wait, so how long have Natasha and Pepper been seeing each other?”

“I guess about as long as I’ve been with Steve, so a few months.”

He paced around the kitchen, mug in hand. “I didn’t even know they were friends, let alone…” said Tony, trailing off.

“Natasha worked for SI, so it’s not like they didn’t know each other,” added Rhodey.

Tony nodded. “That’s true, but Natasha also lied about her identity so she could spy on me for Fury, which means she also lied to Pepper.”

Rhodey added, “Coincidentally, so did you, and she forgave you. Clearly, she forgave Natasha.”

“Clearly,” repeated Tony. The tension was hanging in the air, palpable.

Rhodey took a deep breath. “Listen, I live and work with Natasha and I didn’t know. Could be why she decided to move into the Tower. I always pictured her living in some brownstone in Brooklyn somewhere.”

“Think she’d adopt a stray?”

Rhodey laughed as Tony joined him at the table. “We should go out,” said Tony, changing the topic.

“Tony, you sure? We can just stay here if you’d rather not venture out into the world.”

“No, I think I need to leave the Tower.”

“Alright, any ideas?”

“Yeah, I have a few. Go get dressed.”

 

Hours later, Tony was sitting in the VIP section of a nightclub, surrounded by half-drunk bottles of rum, vodka, and champagne.

_What a combination._

The reverberations of the music and the dim lighting only worsened his blinding headache. He had lost sight of Rhodey for a while, but had found him again, chatting with a woman at the far end of the bar. From his vantage point, he couldn’t make out their expressions.

He had taken off his jacket, tossing it beside him. His tie was draped over his neck, and his dress shirt was mostly unbuttoned. Tony took another sip from his glass, at least, he thought it was his glass.

He couldn’t feel the burn as the amber liquid went down, numb to the sensation.

He threw his head back as he ran his fingers through his hair, trying to remember what had happened over the course of the night. The memories slowly came back to him.

They had been to a different bar, but Rhodey had dragged them out. Then, they ended up here. Tony remembered paying for a round of drinks. Then, a second.

He was trying to figure out how much he had drank, but he couldn’t keep his numbers straight. _God, Tony. What the fuck happened to you?_

He hadn’t intended on drinking so much, but then again, that was always the case. He needed to get back to the Tower. He checked his watch but it was dim in the club, and his vision was blurred, so he could barely make out the time. _Jesus, Tony. You fucked up this time._  

Just then, Rhodey came back, looking furious. “Tony, I’ve been looking everywhere for you –”

Tony held up a hand. “Don’t yell. Headache. Just – just, tell me I didn’t try to fuck anyone.”

“Other than me, you mean,” said Rhodey, lowering his voice. “No, but you were getting pretty cozy with this Japanese girl.”

“OH, DID YOU GET A NAME,” replied Tony, louder than he had intended.

“No. I didn’t get a name. Even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. I told her you were taken. _Steve_. Remember him? You’ve been a mess since he left.”

Rhodey sighed. “I apologized on your behalf and sent her away. She found the whole thing charming, believe it or not.”

“What can I say? Women find me charming.”

“Yes, women think they find you charming until they find you puking your brains out, on the floor of a bathroom, in your suit.”

Rhodey pulled Tony to his feet.

“Rhodey, are we talking about Pepper again because I thought we weren’t going to talk about Pepper again.”

“We’re not talking about Pepper. We were talking about the cute Japanese girl you were flirting with before I dragged you out of there. You done? You ready to go?”

“God yes, my fucking head is killing me.”

“Yeah well, you should’ve thought of that when you decided you wanted to treat the whole bar to endless rounds of tequila and then goad the owner into a drinking contest you, ultimately, lost. Come on,” said Rhodey, offering him his jacket, “let’s go back home.”

“Fuck, Rhodey, I’m sorry,” said Tony, slurring his words. He rubbed his eyes.

“Oh, we’re well past apologies at this point.” Rhodey ran a hand down his face and said, “Why did I listen to you? We should’ve stayed in the Tower.”

Tony looked at him, unable to focus. _Fuck_.

“I’m sorry, this wasn’t s-supposed to happen,” said Tony taking the jacket Rhodey offered him. “I fucked up.”

“Hopefully, this doesn’t end up on TMZ and you can go back to being a hermit until your boyfriend shows up.”

Back at the Tower, Tony collapsed on his bed. “FRIDAY, clear his schedule for tomorrow. He needs to rest,” said Rhodey as he helped Tony take off his shoes. “Tony, seriously… You’re a mess.”

“Is this why Pepper left me?”

“Oh no… Oh no, you don’t. We are definitely not having this conversation right now. We’ll talk about this in the morning if you really want to discuss it, but you already know the answer. Go to sleep, Tony,” said Rhodey as he shut off the lights and closed the door, leaving Tony alone with his thoughts.

 

“Think I handled that well?”

“Colonel Rhodes, you couldn’t have predicted how tonight was going to go.”

“So that’s a no… Wake me up if he’s up before me, FRIDAY.”

“Will do, Colonel.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on [Tumblr](http://lavengadoraaa.tumblr.com).

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to follow me on [Tumblr](http://viudanegraaa.tumblr.com).


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